Tuesday, January 4, 2011

The glory of electronic communication--AKA, down with telephones

Good evening everyone--

When I first started researching Asperger's and Autism Spectrum disorder, one of the first things I read was that Aspies dislike talking on the telephone, and much prefer email, text messaging, and other forms of electronic communication.  I thought immediately, well, yeah.  That describes me perfectly.  I find being on the phone exhausting, difficult, and I know I don't communicate what I really feel OR understand what people are trying to tell me nearly as well as when I have words in front of my face.  This becomes a real problem when the topic of the phone call relates to important issues--medical, financial, career, etc. Heck, I can't pick up on vocal cues when I am in person, and now I am supposed to do this over the phone?  Added to this, I am a visual learner, and have a hard time absorbing what I don't see.

I know many, MANY people who feel exactly the same way who don't have Asperger's--but pretty much every Aspie I've read or talked to does.  In my case, it is definitely a family trait.  The amazing Erudite Mom is exactly the same way and she is not an Aspie, to give an example.

I am curious--how do you like to communicate?  Do you like both, depending on the situation, and if you have a preference, why?  And if you are like me and have almost a pathological hatred of making or taking phone calls, what do you do to overcome it in those situations you can't avoid that cursed invention of Mr. Bell?

My ulterior motive for writing this post?  Thursday morning I have a phone call interview (not about a job, curses!) of great importance.  I have to do a really good job of getting my point across, and I have to do it on the phone.  I have it written out what I can't forget to say, but... 

I have to admit to being very nervous that I won't do a good job, so any tips and tricks are vastly appreciated by me, and hopefully, other readers of this blog.

Here but for the grace of God go I...



  1. I love talking on the phone. It's the only way I can get anything around the house done. Maybe I'm the opposite of an aspie? Is there such a thing? The only way I can clean my house or do a major project, is if I'm on the phone chatting with my cousin or sisters about nothing in particular. I just run around the house, frantically cleaning and talking and VOILA an hour later I've got about 10 jobs done and don't even remember doing them. I don't know if I have any advice for you other than to not put too much pressure on yourself. Close your eyes while you are on the phone and pretend you are sitting there, facing that person. I hear that aspies have a hard time recognizing social cues, so just imagine that person thinks you're the smartest, coolest person ever and that they have a pleasant, "I want to hear MORE" look on their face and that they mean it. ;)
    Maybe it would be best to make your important phone calls in the dark bathroom with no cats to distract you? I don't know, I'm just making suggestions based on what I THINK might work, based on what I know about you. I'm NOT a professional heeheehee!

  2. I know it's a challenge for you talking on the phone, but given our experiences on the phone together and hearing you talk to others via the phone, I believe you express yourself very well.

  3. Well, I survived! I might even have done a good enough job to get the result I need. Thanks, everyone.

  4. She does do a great jjob on the phone--when we listen to her from the outside. On the inside she's controlled tight as a drum methinks.

  5. I DID get a good enough job to get the results I need! Glory be to God, and thanks for all the prayers!